Empathy

Since turning 21 life has been kind of a whirlwind. A series of feeling like a girl boss and then feeling like I can’t even put my shoe on the right foot. Growing up is just SO fun *intense sarcasm*. But actually, it is, it’s also confusing, messy, and hard. This is an age where every decision feels like a decision that could make or break your future and that’s a lot of pressure feeling like you might ruin your life before it even gets started. I think this is such a detrimental time not because it’s feels like every decision has a weight attached to it, but because these constant decisions, some right, some wrong teach us empathy. Whether we admit it or not as human beings we instinctually are quick to judge. I myself am very guilty of this. We judge peoples relationships from a distance and think we have the right to say they could do better, I would never be okay with that, that is too much of a sacrifice. But how do we really know that? We judge peoples job choice:

why would she work there, he’s stuck in high school, I would never live there. The problem is that all this judgement comes with such limited perspective and a lack of the other side of the story that isn’t public to the whole world. We don’t see the way he looks at her when she just wakes up in the morning, we don’t know the fear people have the paralyzes them, we don’t know the joy that others get from what is unknown to us, we don’t know the hidden gems in the towns we’ve never heard of. We don’t know, so why do we judge. In the past couple months I have been faced with situations that I never thought I would. Some of these I handled with less grace than I am proud of. It’s easy to say what you would or wouldn’t do, until your sitting their facing it. So, yes, it sucks making all of these decisions and falling short, but my goodness there is hidden gold in these mistakes. These messy situations soak your heart in empathy, understanding and forgiveness. They instill humility in us that remind us life is not a smooth paved road. It all molds us into better people so next time you don’t understand someones decision judgement doesn’t blind us with the dilution of, “I would never do that,” but rather, “I wonder why they did?” I’ve decided to lay my judgment on the ground, look at others with a heart full of empathy, be quick to apologize and forgive without hesitation.